Breakfast Sandwich #151 - Tally's Tap & Eatery aka Egg Reassurance

Sandwich: Tally's Sunset Special
Location: Tally's Tap & Eatery
Date: January 12, 2020
Cost: $9

I'd been to Tally's a few times but either hadn't noticed the breakfast sandwich hiding at the bottom of the menu or it was added as part of their recent menu update. I'd like to think they added it specifically because they noticed that I'd been coming in but I know that's not true and I can't convince myself that I'm a sandwich influencer in Waukesha County. Not yet. But let's be honest, Waukesha County could probably use some influencing, sandwich or otherwise.

I was just about to order Breakfast Tacos when I saw the Tally's Sunset Special lurking in the horizontal stripe at the bottom of the menu. Your yolks can run, but they can't hide. This day just took a turn for the better - a breakfast sandwich has come into my life. A surprise breakfast sandwich. Oh, the glory. 

I nearly missed it.

Nice, right?

This photo is a disaster. It looks like I tried to cut my sandwich in half with a ballpoint pen.

The Sandwich - Tally's Sunset Special. The name confuses me as the sandwich is only served during breakfast which is more of a sunrise type of situation - but let's not get sidetracked by that. 

As far as breakfast sandwich meats go, if given the choice, ham is usually not going to make the cut with me. I'm always afraid I'll get some sad deli ham and that's not a proper foundation for a sandwich. But I had no choice on this day. Ham was my destiny and I was OK with it because the menu description started with "Two eggs prepared the way you like" and the importance of this cannot be overstated. Too many places just tell you how they're going to make your chicken egg, or worse, they don't even tell you! You order your sandwich and all of a sudden you're playing egg roulette with a person you've never met. That's a dangerous game and I don't like my odds and frankly, it's inexcusable. The egg is versatile and can be served on a sandwich in a variety of ways and we know you can do it. So, pull it together menu-makers of America. Give us egg variety or give us...death? That seems a bit dramatic but I think you understand my point. Are you with me here, America? If you are not, I cannot in good conscious be your sandwich influencer.

I ordered my eggs over medium and they were done perfectly. You've already seen the yolks so you know this. 

Before I went off on my egg rant I was talking about the ham. It was NOT sad deli ham. I cannot pretend to know the origins of said not-sad ham, but it was not sad. Not at all.

The other part of this sandwich that I liked was that it comes on a grilled asiago focaccia bun. Here was the only misstep of the sandwich. This bun did not appear to have been grilled. It was tasty and it held up throughout the entire process, but it was rather squishy and grilling it would have helped quite a bit and given it hat nice toasty quality. Perhaps the underside was lightly grilled and I couldn't see it on the inside of the sandwich. If so, it merely kissed the grill.

Oh, there was also cheddar cheese. It was lost in the flavors of the ham and the asiago bun, and that's fine.

The Result - 4.30 Egg Temper Tantrums out of 5 Egg Temper Tantrums. This was a somewhat basic sandwich with the added touch of being served on asiago focaccia that may or may not have been lightly grilled. My ham trepidation was unfounded. Being allowed to order my chicken eggs any-damn-way-I-please and then having them arrive exactly as I thought was reassuring. My wish that the bun had been grilled a bit more was only minimally upsetting. I enjoyed this sandwich and the hash browns were fantastic as well.

Instagram
Twitter
Facebook page

Breakfast Sandwich #140 - Bassett Street Brunch Club aka Doy!

Sandwich: Bagel Breakfast Sandwich w/bacon
Location: Bassett Street Brunch Club
Date: August 10, 2019
Cost: $12.45, with mixed greens or potatoes.

There has been a casual goal of revisiting locations in 2019 to see if they have have spruced up their menus or upped their game, or, just to try a different sandwich. That hasn't been happening much but I have made it back to Kwik Trip, Gotham Bagels and McDonald's. Let's be honest here, Kwik Trip and McDonald's barely count. They're just slinging out grab-n-go sandwiches instead creating something made to order. They could be making their sandwiches with love, it's not impossible, but their modus operandi is efficiency and volume.

I knew I wanted to get back to Bassett Street Brunch Club for a few reasons. #A, I was aware that they had changed the menu and the breakfast sandwich was now different than the one I had waaaaay back at Breakfast Sandwich #5. #B, the Horchata Latte - steamed horchata poured through espresso. People have a specific reactions when I tell them about this drink, they either insist they need it immediately or they are nonplussed at my enthusiasm. #C, due to the location of B.S.B.C, it's really only convenient to visit via bicycle, and early in the day at that. When I'm on a sandwich mission I don't have the patience to stand in line and I'm not going to drive downtown and try to find somewhere to park my car. That's dumb. I was awake early and it was pleasant biking weather and I felt that my mission was clear.

Today was the day for the repeat visit. It was obvious. It was in my daily sandwich horoscope - "Bacon has just entered the house of Virgo and with chicken egg in retrograde there is no better time for runny yolk to make it's presence felt. Remember that when emotions get oozy a simple piece of toasted bread can provide the balance needed to focus on the present." Doy.

I forgot to take a photo of the menu cause I was distracted by the Horchata Latte. Who cares? Here is the description:

Bagel Breakfast Sandwich

A toasted "everything" bagel filled with a fried egg, avocado, cheddar, and pesto aioli. Served with breakfast potatoes or mixed greens. Add ham or bacon for 1.50.

I don't know what happened with this photo but it looks like I took it using a drone or something. (I didn't.)

As far as my generally crappy photos go, this one is pretty good. I feel like I really Leibovitzed this one. 

The Sandwich - Bagel Breakfast Sandwich. I added the bacon. Doy. I didn't bike all the way down there to not have bacon. Plus, my sandwich horoscope was pretty clear about bacon. First impression - the bagel was way under toasted if it was toasted at all. It may have just been sitting in a warm room. I admit it rankled me a bit. Second impression -  I wish that egg would have been runny. Third impression - the avocado was perfectly ripe and I've said it before but more breakfast sandwiches should have avocado. The avocado and the pesto aioli teamed up to give this a wonderful creamy texture that played well off the salty bacon. The pesto aioli was understated in a good way and the cheddar wasn't particularly forefront either. But here is how it fell short of it's potential - cook that egg over-medium so the yolk is runny, toast the bagel to a crispy outer layer and let the diner wallow in the slopification of it all. Here's an extra napkin. Of all the bagels the "everything" bagel seems to benefit most from toasting. I think it's the sesame seeds.

The Result - 3.59 Doys out of 5 Doys. It's a tasty sandwich but we don't grade potential here, we grade results. It had room for improvement, especially at the $12.45 price point. That's a bit pricey but avocados are like bitcoins right now, you never know how much they're going to cost. Maybe that's part of it. The mixed greens help, I've stated my love of mixed greens with a sandwich numerous times and these were zippy and tangy and exactly what you think they were. Still, it's just some mixed greens. I'm probably starting to sound like a cheapskate. 

They still have the robot theme going on here and I still don't understand it but I do like it. 

Now that I've completed this review it's safe to check my notes from the previous review. Hmmm, very similar comments on the greens and the robots. I also sound like a cheapskate in that review but it was a different sandwich. I did rank this one higher but I think know my rankings have been increasing in general since 2015. 

Instagram
Twitter
Facebook page

Breakfast Sandwich #134 - Faircrest Bakery & Cafe aka These Are Words With A "D" This Time

Sandwich: Croissandwich
Location: Faircrest Bakery & Cafe
Date: April 30, 2019
Cost: $6.99

I don't know how you're supposed to spell croissandwich. Burger King removes the "d" and puts an apostrophe in there which seems a bit highfalutin for a place that serves ultra-crappy breakfast sandwiches and managed to plague a neighborhood with rats due to their shoddy dumpster and refuse handling practices. Gross. I'm not even sure why Burger King is messing around with croissants, they haven't earned that privilege. 

Faircrest Bakery & Cafe (web site down at time of publication - Ed.) is in that cute little strip mall on Mineral Point Road just west of Cuna Mutual. They spell croissandwich with a "d" but I'm still uncomfortable with the word. I just don't care for it but that's my problem and I'm not going to hold it against the sandwich.

On this Tuesday morning I happened to be in the area and stopped in to see if they could serve me a breakfast sandwich. Worst case scenario is I come away with a muffin or a scone. My sandwich senses were right on - they have a breakfast sandwich croissandwich on the menu!

This is a terrible photo even by my standards.

Turkey sausage wrapped in a blanket of chicken egg.

The Sandwich - Croissandwich. It's the only breakfast sandwich on the menu and the only option they offer is bacon or "all natural" turkey sausage. It occurred to me that I'd never had turkey sausage on a breakfast sandwich and that was an opportunity I couldn't pass up even though it felt a little weird. I'm not sure what the "all natural" part is - no nitrates added, maybe? I'm not going to get all FDA on this and do any research so I'll just go with my assumption. From the first bite I did not regret getting the sausage - it was fantastic. I immediately wondered why turkey sausage isn't offered on more breakfast sandwiches. The only cheese choice is cheddar but it worked well with the turkey sausage and there was just enough to give the sandwich a bit of goo factor since they don't serve the egg runny. I've complained about croissants used for sandwiches in the past - they often don't hold up. In this case it worked well and was a nice squishy bread choice. I assume they make the croissants on site, they are a bakery after all. I ordered this to go and while I didn't go far the foil wrapping may have caused the sandwich to steam itself a bit, which did not detract from my enjoyment and may have even enhanced it.

The Result - 4.15 These Are Words With A "D" This Time out of 5 These Are Words With A "D" This Time. This was a very good breakfast sandwich. It was made to order, but only took a couple of minutes, and held up after a short drive. Turkey sausage deserves your consideration when offered and I feel like I should say this even though it's dumb - it tasted just like sausage! Anyway, this is a simple, tasty and filling sandwich. At $6.99 it's a touch on the pricey side but it's a quality sandwich served by a local, independently owned business that is worthy of our support. I've had enough of Panera, thanks, but no thanks. From what I've read about Faircrest Bakery while researching this review I'd like to try some of their baked goods but I'm not sure when I'll be back in the area. 

Instagram
Twitter
Facebook page

Breakfast Sandwich #132 - Gotham Bagels aka Time To Revisit The Classics

Sandwich: Spicy Italian Sausage, Egg & Cheddar
Location: Gotham Bagels
Date: March 9, 2019
Cost: $6.25?

This trip to Gotham was an impulsive Saturday morning decision and it turns out I hadn't had a breakfast sandwich there since October of 2015. That's just silly. I know I loved that sandwich and perhaps it's a clear indication that it's time to circle back around to some of the Top 25 Breakfast Sandwiches of all time to see if they're still changing lives. 

It arrives wrapped and snug in it's paper cocoon.

I didn't take a photo of it unwrapped but you know what an everything bagel looks like, right? Besides, look at that tantalizing sandwich! If it could talk it would say something like "Hello, I'm here to make everything wonderful".

The Sandwich - Spicy Italian Sausage, Egg & Cheddar. It's not listed on their online menu and I didn't take a photo of the menu so I'm not sure of the price. I remember it was 6 something.

No options are offered when you order other than you select the type of bagel you want. I went all in with the everything bagel (the "doughnut with sprinkles" for adults). This is going to sound crazy but I ordered it to go. I didn't know it would be wrapped in two layers of paper, perfect for transport, and it also didn't occur to me that if you're going to get a breakfast sandwich "to go", a hearty bagel is the perfect vehicle for it. A biscuit? No way is a decent biscuit going to handle a journey of more than a few feet. It's unfair to ask a biscuit to do that - you might as well ask your cat to wash the windows. Most of the time you can't even get a biscuit from your plate to your mouth without some type of crumbling incident. I'm getting off into the weeds here, I don't want to sound like I hate biscuits.

The sandwich was a thing of beauty when unwrapped. Perfectly sliced with a little melty cheese sneaking out the edges it forced me to pause and absorb it's visage. The bagel really shines here, dense enough to keep everything in check but not too doughy or heavy. In fact, the egg could have been yolkier and this would have still held up. I wish the egg HAD been yolkier but the sandwich wasn't lacking the ooze factor, I'm just saying it wouldn't have hurt if it was. The sausage is the real star of the show though - they says it's spicy and it really is. Not a little bit spicy but with some real kick. I'll often add hot sauce to my breakfast sandwich if it's available but this is easily the spiciest breakfast sandwich I've gotten straight out of the kitchen. How refreshing. The cheddar cheese and egg balance and compliment the heat a bit and the whole thing comes together quite perfectly.

The Result - 4.8 Revisitations out of 5 Revisitations. I don't know why it took me so long to get back to Gotham. Looking back at my review from October of 2015 I wrote that I'd definitely be back to try the Spicy Italian Sausage Sandwich. I was not consciously aware of that on this day but maybe it lingered somewhere in my mind for over 3 years. This sandwich earned a spot in the All Time Top 25 and I think it really is an indication that I need to roll through some of the top sandwich locations again. You know, for research.

Instagram
Twitter
Facebook page

Breakfast Sandwich #121 - Lazy Jane's aka Still Lazy After All These Years

Sandwich: Speedy Eggwich
Location: Lazy Jane's Cafe
Date: June 24, 2018
Cost: $4.25

My previous review of Lazy Jane's was in May of 2016 but I didn't know that until I looked it up just now. It's likely I would have guessed it had been about two years. I usually don't consider going there due to the inevitable line-out-the-door but it was suggested to me on this early morning and I immediately heard the call of the scone. I knew if we got moving we'd beat the line and we did. It didn't appear that much had changed since my previous trip and why would they change anything? Why mess with a line that snakes out the door every weekend?

They wisely file would be diners past the bakery case (OK, they probably don't have a choice) and choosing your scone is probably more difficult than deciding what combo of eggs and protein you'll be getting. Not to spoil the review but in the future I might be better off ordering three scones and coffee and juice. I can make eggs but there is almost no chance I'm going to bake scones.

That's a proper cheese melt right there.

The cross section reveals truth.

The Sandwich - Speedy Eggwich. It's the only breakfast sandwich on the menu and there are no options offered. As luck would have it I was in the mood for sausage although I did briefly flirt with the idea of getting a scramble or something other than a sandwich. My sense of duty prevailed and I padded it with a side order of cheesy grits and a scone. Wholly unnecessary but irresistible. You may be aware that when I review a place for a second time I do not read my previous review so as to have an entirely fresh perspective. This can, and does, lead to redundancy or consistency, it depends on how you look at it. Having said that I'm pretty sure this order was a duplicate of the order from two years ago with the possible exception of scone choice.

Upon preparing for the cross section photo the first discovery was that the chicken egg was not runny. I fought back my tears and valiantly soldiered forward. Sense of duty, again. I've had plenty of sandwiches that didn't have a runny egg but I was really hoping for it on this one. Also apparent from the start was that the English Muffin was overly toasted and a bit too crunchy. It gave it a dryness I didn't appreciate. It was getting harder and harder to continue but I was hungry and of course I was going to devour this sandwich - let's not kid ourselves. On a positive note the sausage hit the right notes and the cheddar cheese was melted properly. 

The Result - 3.12 Senses of Duty out of 5 Senses of Duty. The sandwich was OK but I had higher hopes and ultimately it kind of missed the mark. It didn't have the squish or the goo-factor I'm looking for in the morning. Perhaps I should have trusted my instincts and left you people without an update on the Speedy Eggwich? I think the sandwich might be an obligatory menu offering - I'll bet it isn't ordered nearly as often as the scrambles and whatnot. Still, there are positives in these situations, such as the cheesy grits and scone. The cheesy grits aren't on the same level as those from Crema Cafe but that's an unrealistic standard. The scones are still fantastic. 

Instagram
Twitter
Facebook page

Breakfast Sandwich #116 - Mint Mark aka Flavor Piñata

Sandwich: Chimera
Location: Mint Mark
Date: April 20, 2018
Cost: $8

Within a few of weeks of Mint Mark opening it's doors I was receiving tips/demands that I try their breakfast sandwiches. Most recommended the Chimera although the Sunday Morning (not available on Sundays) also had it's supporters. 

While I'd been there for drinks and a few small plates from the dinner menu I had yet to make it for breakfast. The breakfast menu is only available Monday through Friday and it's rare that I go out for a breakfast sandwich during the work week unless it's a grab-n-go type of a deal. 

It was only a matter of time and on this morning I felt the call of the sandwich shortly after waking. You know exactly what I'm talking about. If you don't, I can't describe it but you might need to slather some mustard on your condiment chakras. I don't know. I'm not a doctor or a medicine man or a lawyer or even an escalator.  

Some day there will be an exhibit of my crappy menu photos at the Photography Hall of Fame and this one will probably be included. 

I sat near the window precisely to get a shot like this. Where does that jalapeño slice think it's going?

I thought cutting this in half would be problematic but I just had to see.

The Sandwich - Chimera. I was in the mood for sausage this day, actually, I was in the mood for this exact sandwich. I knew I was going to get it before I left the house so the Sunday Morning sandwich will just have to wait. (I'm looking forward to it though - a ham breakfast sandwich has to be done right and we have a couple of very solid offerings in Porter and Johnson Public House. The bar has been set.) There are no variations offered upon ordering. The sandwich is an adorable little flaker and won me over as soon as I saw it. The biscuit was crumbly and I feared the worst as I cut it in half for the crucial cross section shot. It actually held together better than I though and SURPRISE - like a potentially salmonella-laced piñata the sandwich unleashed runny yolk. I did not see that coming. What a pleasant surprise. Happy birthday to me. (It was not my birthday.) The jalapeños were milder than expected, as was the sausage. I don't know if the sausage is made in house but it had a lean and smooth texture to it. The cheddar blended well and is the perfect cheese for this sandwich. There are a lot of flavors here that mix well but none are overpowering. The biscuit just barely kept it together and if this had been a larger sandwich I don't think it could have done the job.

The Result - 4.62 Flavor Piñatas out of 5 Flavor Piñatas. There is a lot here to trumpet - flavors and sights and textures - it's a beautiful and delicious sandwich and deserving of the praise that it's supporters sent my way. I did wish that it had a little more kick, not much, just a touch. I kept expecting that little extra nudge, be it the sausage or peppers or dijonaise or some combination of those. It didn't happen. That shouldn't detract from the glory of this sandwich. I'm quibbling about personal preferences at this point but somebody has to do it. 

Instagram
Twitter
Facebook page

Breakfast Sandwich(es) #108A & 108B - Tales Of Leftover Ham

Sandwich(es): Ham, Cheese(s), Spinach
Date: 12/30/17

Woe to be a reader longing for tales of sandwiches at local eating huts while I speak of lab sandwiches yet again.

I already knew this would happen and said as much in review #107. Any self respecting sandwich artiste with leftover Honeybaked Ham would have done the same and I will not apologize. As if the leftover ham were not enough I found myself sitting next to a Thomas' English Muffin truck while waiting at a stoplight and took that as a clear sign that I needed Nooks & Crannies in my life. Astute readers will note that recent experiments have been built upon Bays English Muffins but the lab is about R&D and you can't ignore clear signs such as seeing a semi truck trailer with a giant photo of a muffin on it. These things don't just happen by accident. (Well, honestly, I drive past a large industrial baking facility several times a week so seeing a muffin truck isn't particularly novel and yet it still excites me.)

There were already chicken eggs in the fridge so the only decisions to make were types of cheese, style of egg, and accoutrements. Those variables are important in sandwich experimentation and cannot be taken lightly and therefore it was clear that two cheeses were needed for two separate sandwiches. Have ham, will sandwich.

108A - Sharp Cheddar Cheese

108B - Muenster

108B on left, 108A on right. Leftover hash browns in foreground. Cheap-ass rice cooker in background.

The Sandwich(es) - The variables were muenster and sharp cheddar cheese. Baby swiss just barely missed the cut. Sorry Baby, we'll get you next time. You can see that the eggs were not done in the typical fashion - no puck-cooking, no runny yolks. These were scrambled with spinach. There may be a different name for scrambling in this fashion but they came out somewhat like a frittata. I don't know what the difference is, if any. (A dash of quick research reveals that adding the spinach before cooking makes it a frittata, at least that is my understanding and I don't care to delve into it much further at this time.) These were simple sandwiches. A liberal dash of Cholula green pepper sauce was the only other ingredient.

The Result(s) - I liked the change up in egg preparation. It held together firmly and yet didn't need any additional viscosity and I didn't even miss the runny yolk, which is saying something. The cheeses were melted perfectly and I don't need to tell you about Honeybaked Ham, do I? I hope not. Adding the spinach gave these a healthy angle that has been missing from the lab recently. I don't think the Nooks & Crannies changed anything but I was already a fan of both Bays and Thomas' and will not play favorites unless one of them decides to start sponsoring this blog. Just kidding, I have fucking integrity, which is why they both should sponsor this blog. Speaking of sponsorships, maybe I need to get some new hot sauce, I don't see any of those sweet Cholula pesos rolling in and I've been talking about that stuff for well over a year. My marketing team sucks. 

Overall, I gave the edge to the sharp cheddar sandwich, the cheddary bite went well with the ham but the muenster had a nice creamy quality to it. Personal preference plays a key roll here. I'm not going to ramble on about these sandwiches - they were both mighty fine and the end result is that you should get yourself some quality ham and make a breakfast sandwich, or two. 

This isn't a cooking blog. What is this, a lifestyle blog? I think it might be. 

Instagram

Twitter

Facebook page

Breakfast Sandwich #106 - I'm Like A Lab Rat For Sandwiches

Sandwich: Summer Sausage, Medium Cheddar, Red Onion, Chicken Egg, Chipotle Cholula Sauce, English Muffin.
Date: 12/2/2017

I had no intention of going back into the lab so soon after the Thanksgiving Leftover Sandwich Extravaganza of last week. Honestly, I didn't have any experimental sandwich combos gnawing away at my psyche that I needed to try. However, at some point during the late morning I was feeling a bit peckish and started poking pecking around in the fridge to see what I could gnaw on and the only viable option was a breakfast sandwich.

There were a few options for meat - summer sausage, hard salami and bacon. In the name of experimentation I dismissed the bacon. I had a quick taste test between the hard salami and the summer sausage and made my choice. You may recall that way back in December of 2015 (The Year of the Breakfast Sandwich TM) I had a delicious summer sausage sandwich at Graze. That's the last time I had a summer sausage breakfast sandwich as Graze appears to be the only place that offers one. It's that or you make your own, I guess. 

The rest of the sandwich ingredients were almost a given - the cheddar was my best cheese option and the English Muffin was a better choice than my bread. I only had egg of chicken as I have not secured an alternative egg source. 

The red onion was a bit of a curveball. Red onion really brings a lot to the party when you're constructing a sandwich. It blends well with many meats and cheeses and seems to pull more flavor out of it's sandwich neighbors. It has to be used sparingly though as it can take over and get a bit obnoxious. A few thinly sliced pieces are often all that is needed. You have to know your limits. I've probably said all of this before.

I've been using the Cholula Green Pepper sauce on eggs a lot lately but thought the smokiness of the Chipotle would compliment the sausage. (Narrators voice: It did). 

All the pieces fell into place.

OK, I went a bit long on the egg.

The Result - Well, hell, this sandwich was swell. It really was excellent and a pleasant change from the normal breakfast sandwich offerings. The onion, cheddar, chipotle hot sauce and sausage blended and danced together well. There were a couple of things that I could have improved on. The egg was cooked a bit too long but life comes at you fast in the frying pan and that's the way it goes sometimes. The English Muffin wasn't toasted as much as I would have liked as a result of putting the tray in the toaster oven to catch dripping cheese. It turns out the cheese didn't drip much and I would have been better off without the tray. Also, a little more cheese would have been ideal. Overall this was a winner and I recommend you make one for yourself, pronto.

This is still not a cooking blog.

Instagram

Twitter

Facebook page

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HNtefWOnWWk

Breakfast Sandwich #99 - Starbucks aka Maybe You've Heard Of It

Sandwich: Sausage, Egg and Cheddar
Location: Starbucks (East Washington Ave.)
Date: September 12, 2017
Cost: $3.45

I think Starbucks is the last national chain for me to visit in the Madison area. I hope so, at least. I need to be free of these chains. There are a few local places I've been meaning to get to but time has not allowed and Starbucks was an easy stop before work. I needed to put this notch in my sandwich belt so I could move on to actual cafes and restaurants. Please God - do not allow Arby's to start selling breakfast sandwiches in the Madison area.

So, there I was at Starbucks. The line for the drive thru was predictably long at 8:15 am but I was planning on going inside anyway. I didn't want to lose whatever freshness the sandwich might have had by waiting until I got to work to eat it.

They have several choices of breakfast sandwich. I had no idea. I guess I don't go to Starbucks very often. I was in the mood for sausage so I didn't think about it too much. (Also, I've been making bacon-based sandwiches at home lately but not writing about them as they aren't really lab experiments. I haven't been pushing the sandwich envelope, just making simple, tasty sandwiches. Pro tip - if you're going to cook your chicken egg inside a Mason jar lid to get that "perfect puck" egg, use plenty of non-stick spray or your egg will stick to the lid and it tears the edges apart and it looks like it's been nibbled by vermin.)

Kinda sad looking.

I didn't have a knife so this was cut with my incisors. It was not nibbled by vermin. 

The Sandwich - Sausage, Egg and Cheddar. These sandwiches come out of sealed plastic bag so while you have several choices you don't have any options once you have made your selection. Starbucks isn't really a food place - everything comes out of bag from a kitchen factory somewhere. For all I know this sandwich was assembled by robots. The chicken egg was exactly what you expect for a pre-packaged sandwich (if you're new to this blog that isn't a good thing.) The microwave setting melted the cheese perfectly - kudos to the Starbucks lab technicians who tested that down to the microsecond. The sandwich was nice and hot. The sausage was actually pretty good. It hit the spot I was hoping it would. Despite being microwaved the English Muffin held up fairly well and wasn't soggy. This is by no means a messy sandwich so it really didn't have it's mettle tested, but it worked.

The Result - 2.75 Breaking The Chains out of 5 Breaking The Chains. This sandwich was fine. It was OK. It was actually tasty in some ways. I can see how it would tide you over until lunch if you're on your way to work. But, it's a $2.75 sandwich masquerading as a $3.45 sandwich. That's not cutting it for this reporter. I swipe left. (I'm going to assume there is a sandwich blog out there where the reviewer either "swipes left" or "swipes right" on a sandwich and that is the review. I'm not going to Google it. You go ahead though. If that doesn't exist it seems like a perfectly good idea for some snarky millennial to pursue.)

Instagram
Twitter
Facebook page

Breakfast Sandwich #84 - Porter aka Hey, Porter

Sandwich: Breakfast Sandwich
Location: Porter
Date: February 11, 2017
Cost: $9

Hey, Porter Hey Porter...ok, now that's out of the way. I'll take the low hanging fruit every time when it comes to writing these reviews.

I don't do a very good job of keeping up with restaurant developments in this city. It seems like there is an awful lot of flux and I'm just a sandwich-face-guy with a day job. This is to say that I appreciate it when people let me know of new restaurants, or sandwiches specifically, which was the case here when Lindsay Christians let me know about Porter.

Breakfast Sandwich | $9 Heritage farms smoked ham, sharp cheddar, red onion, stone ground mustard and an over medium egg* on a brioche roll (mixed veggies available in place of ham on request).

*eating runny eggs or rare beef might make you sick, but probably not.

I really like that runny egg/rare beef disclaimer. I want to have a t-shirt made with that phrase on it.

Pop that in your pocket and get along little doggy.

You look nice today. That bun really accentuates your ham. 

The Sandwich - Breakfast Sandwich. I briefly considered getting the Porter Pocket in addition to the Breakfast Sandwich. It sounds delicious but that seemed like too much for one day so I'll just have to go back another time.

Right out of the gate I like that this sandwich is described as having an over medium egg, so you know it will be a bit runny, which could make you sick, but probably not. (It didn't.) If you're going to offer a ham based breakfast sandwich it had better be some damn fine ham, and that is the case here. Nobody wants regular-old-sweaty-deli-ham on their breakfast sandwich. Sharp cheddar cheese always pairs well with ham and I'm a big fan of mustard, stone ground or not. In my review of Breakfast Sandwich #74 I extolled the scant use of red onion to perk up a sandwich and they have that going on here, which plays well with the flavor of the mustard. 

As a whole the sandwich has a just-too-salty-enough flavor that was perfect for me. The egg and cheese give it the viscosity it needs and the ham, mustard and onion combo is a welcome change from standard breakfast sandwich offerings. Oh, the bun. The bun did it's job. I don't want to take it for granted but that's all I have to say about it. It was admirable in its ability to allow me to cram bite after bite into my face. 

Note - I usually cut the sandwiches in half so you can see a cross section of the goods. This sandwiches height is almost the same as its diameter and I knew that if I cut it in half everything would fall apart. I couldn't have that. 

The Result - 4.8 Runny Egg Disclaimers out of 5 Runny Egg Disclaimers. A strong contender for Sandwich Of The Year, this one came at me with a bit of hype but it lived up to it. I will try the Porter Pocket one day but it will tough to pass over ordering this again. I can't say what would give this sandwich a score of 5. Maybe a touch of hot sauce, which they may have had there, I didn't look. 

Aside - I'm hoping I can get to Sandwich #100 this year. It shouldn't be very hard and it's important to have goals. I was recently talking with one of the executives at my company and he asked me where I saw myself in five years. I said I hoped to have over 200 Breakfast Sandwiches under my belt, literally, and then I laughed but I was the only one laughing. 

Instagram

Twitter

Facebook page

Breakfast Sandwich #81 - The Continental Cob Job

Sandwich: Continental Cob Job
Location: Hotel
Date: December 24, 2016
Cost: Included with cost of the room

My hotel had complimentary continental breakfast. Inside a silver clamshell there were little sausage patties and fried eggs that looked like plastic toys a kid would have in their play kitchen. They also had slices of cheddar and an assortment of bread. Well, by God, I can cobble together a sandwich out of this!

Ok, that looks kinda lame.

The question is this - did it taste better than the red snowflake doily in the background?

The Sandwich - There isn't much more to say about the sandwich that I didn't describe above. The toaster they had kind of sucked. I toasted the English Muffin and it took too long but still didn't appear toasted. I grabbed an egg but 1/2 of another egg stuck to it so I had some bonus egg. The cheese was strategically placed between the sausage patty and chicken egg in hopes of achieving some melt, which it did. Just a bit.

The Result - 2.99 Sandwich Life Hacks out of 5 Sandwich Life Hacks. It wasn't that bad but it wasn't very good either. The next day I made a waffle instead. It's kind of sad that this was the last breakfast sandwich of 2016 but these things happen. The previous day I had the glorious puffy egg cloud sandwich and then I had this thing. Life is a roller coaster.

Instagram

Twitter

Facebook page

Dear Diary, I Bought A Toaster Oven aka Breakfast Sandwiches #74, #75, #76

Dear Diary,

With 2016 coming to a close I have found myself increasingly uncertain about the future of the country and the psyche of Americans in general. Like many Americans I sought to quell my anxiety by participating in the fetishized consumerism of Black Friday. If there is one thing that can calm a tizzied mind it's a small kitchen appliance and lots and lots of cheese and bacon. That's more than one thing but you get my point. Diary, this may be nothing more than the ramblings of a man gone mad for sandwiches but if you need me I'll be in the lab making breakfast sandwiches. Beyond the settling of a harried consciousness I think that the sandwich might be the key to uniting a divided country. There is research to do. Nothing less than the future of our country is at stake.
---
What happened is that I needed a new toaster and while shopping I realized that a toaster oven costs only slightly more than a regular toaster yet offers so much more. PROS: increased sandwichibility. CONS: reduced counter space. Sandwiches win, naturally.

There are a ridiculous amount of toaster ovens available. Black & Decker, Kitchenaid, Cuisinart, Breville, and Hamilton Beach are all in the toaster oven game. Shit. I'd never heard of Breville but their toaster ovens look really nice and cost more than twice that of a Cuisinart. When did Black & Decker start making kitchen appliances? Does Cuisinart make chainsaws? After much deliberation I ended up with the Cuisinart TOB-60N1 which looks adequate for my needs.

For a variety of reasons, not that one needs a reason, I already had a plethora of cheese on hand. Whole milk Swiss, butterkase, brick, extra sharp cheddar, pepper jack, Monterey jack, some kind of Gouda. That's just what pops into my head right now and that seem like good options for a breakfast sandwich.

I also already had bacon. One package of English Muffins later I was ready to get to work.

Breakfast Sandwich #74 - bacon, butterkase, red onion, egg.

#74 - My first sandwich in the Cuisinart.

#74 - Proper chicken egg

#74 Result - A strong first take. Butterkase is a good cheese for a breakfast sandwich, it melts nicely and is creamy. I should have used more bacon, this was only two pieces. Scant usage of red onion was the key here. Pound for pound nothing adds a little zip to a sandwich like red onion but you have to use it sparingly. This sandwich emboldened me and gave me hope.

---

Breakfast Sandwich #75 - bacon, whole milk Swiss, mild giardiniera, egg.

#75 - That's the last of my whole milk aged Swiss cheese. I'm feeling melancholy. 

#75 - How pretty is that? Yes, that is a kitty cat coffee creamer pourer in the background. 

#75 - Nice, but I should have drained the giardiniera a little more. The kitty is waving for your attention. That squash don't give a shit about you though.  

#75 Result - Strong, but needs work. It was tough to say goodbye to the last of my whole milk aged Swiss cheese. It was purchased in the Cheese Tent at Cheese Days and I don't know when I'll be able to get more, but damn, it was some good-ass cheese.  I used three strips of bacon this time and mild giardiniera. Cooked the egg just a little too long but that turned out to be for the better. I buttered the muffin and didn't drain the giardiniera enough so this got a little sloppy. A runny yolk would have made this a full on mess. This was a very tasty sandwich but could have been refined. 

---

#76 - bacon, extra sharp cheddar, Sriracha mayo, egg. 

#76 - Take a little turn on the catwalk sandwich, you're looking fine!

#76 - Oh fuck. That's a hot mess. Also, I need some new plates that are less visually distracting. 

#76 Result - the yin and yang of sandwich making? In terms of flavor this sandwich was a real dynamo. I thought that the Sriracha mayo and extra sharp cheddar would blend nicely, and they did. Those flavors pair wonderfully with the salty bacon. Yeah! I had some missteps in production though. I tried putting the tray in the bottom of the toaster oven to help with dripping cheese clean up and that affected the toasting of the muffins. I overcooked the egg so there was no runny yolk. Then I tried to cut the sandwich with a butter knife, but the muffin was too squishy from lack of toasting and you can see how that turned out. Well, shit. My only excuse is that I was trying to get ready for work and was also making my lunchtime sandwich at the same time. Did I mention how tasty this was? It was amazing.

Instagram

Twitter

Facebook page

Breakfast Sandwich #70 - Plaka Taverna aka Everything Is Just Fine

Sandwich: Egg, Bacon & Cheese
Location: Plaka Taverna
Date: November 12, 2016
Cost: $3.75

I reviewed a sandwich from Plaka Taverna last summer at the height of my dedication/obsession with this project. I've mentioned previously that since that stretch I think my ratings have gone up a little. Maybe the ratings at that time were more accurate and maybe I'm not even correct in that assessment as I haven't tried to break it down into a chart or graph that will help me to understand it. I can't be sure but I do know that nobody is concerned with this so I'll just drop it.

Last Saturday I was headed through the downtown area and wanted a quick breakfast. It seemed like a good time to try Plaka again.

I took a single photo. I felt like I really captured the essence of this sandwich in this photo and there was no reason to take another.

The Sandwich - Egg, Bacon & Cheese. I was tempted to try the sausage or the Egg & Gyro on a Pita, but I was in the mood for bacon. The other option is choice of cheese and I went with cheddar, rather than American or Swiss. The bacon was cooked to a nice crisp. The eggs were folded and not runny and the sandwich comes on an English Muffin, which I have noted before is an ideal breakfast sandwich delivery system. This one could have used more toasting on the outside, it was a little too squishy.

The Results - 3.99 Perfectly Fine Sandwiches out of 5 Perfectly Fine Sandwiches. I guess that's the main takeaway here - it was all just fine. Other than the bacon all the components could have been just a little bit better. Eggs + runnier, Cheese + meltier, English Muffin + toastier = Sandwich tastier. The American Fries were excellent and had a nice crunchy outer layer to them, like a sweet hippie kid.

Now that I've gotten to this point I went back and looked at my first review of Plaka, just to compare. I didn't mean to, but I ordered the same sandwich and said almost the exact same things about it, especially regarding the bacon and the muffin. BUT, and it's a big but, I rated that sandwich 3.42 and this one 3.99, which just goes to show that Plaka is more consistent than I am.

Follow on Twitter @BunBreakfast (also on Instagram with the same name)

Facebook page

Breakfast Sandwich #67 - Ted's Market & Delicatessen aka I'm a Tedhead

Sandwich: Ted's McMuffin
Location: Ted's Market & Delicatessen
Date: October 14, 2016
Cost: $5

Things have gotten to the point where if I'm going to travel to another city I do a search for "Best breakfast sandwiches in Timbuktu". In this case I was traveling to San Francisco, not Timbuktu, so I knew there would be plenty of options.

Too many options, it turns out. The "best of" search turned up this and this and this and this. There were more, of course, but I already had more data than I could crunch. With those lists in hand I put on my green eyeshade and starting cross referencing selections and noting locations of desired sandwiches. I have to admit I even factored in some of the article comments. Wading into the comments section is always treacherous but in food related writings you can often find helpful tips such as recipe modifications and it's easy to tell if somebody is just a blowhard or a crank whose opinion you can ignore.

Having said all that, I made a list of San Francisco breakfast sandwiches that I wanted to try. I knew at best I would only get to try three, and that was only if I went out each morning I had available. That was unlikely to happen. Also, some are offered only during weekend brunch which narrowed it to one morning for those locations. I think you can see my dilemma. I think you can feel my dilemma. I had more sandwiches than time. This is always the case, but when traveling the feeling is magnified.

Because I put the effort in, because I sifted and winnowed for sandwich truth, I'm going to put my listings here in the hopes that it helps some intrepid traveling stomach. This list was heavily weighted towards where I was staying, which was "SoMa".

Devil's Teeth Baking Company. This was not really close to me at all which is the reason I never made it there. They rated high on at least two lists, and in comments. I shed a tear of regret over not making it to Devil's Teeth.

Arlequin Cafe. I don't remember what the appeal was. It was close by but I never made it.

Merigan Sub Shop. Well, shit. By the time I made it out there the web site said the store was closed for good. Too bad, the Breakfast section of the menu looked awesome. I shed another tear of regret over this one.

Réveille Coffee Co. I wanted their Toad In A Hole. Read about it here. They had me at "golden cyclops of a yolk-eye", but I didn't make it there either. More tears of regret.

Bacon Bacon. A couple people said this place is overrated and I was feeling that might be the case. Is it San Francisco's "Mickie's Dairy Bar", a place that tons of people love but that doesn't really seem to warrant the love? I don't know, I never made it.

The Grove. Breakfast served all day. I probably could have squeezed one in. No tears, no excuses.

Sulameria. Fried chicken & egg sandwich with prosciutto and chili hollandaise on a sesame seed bun. Damn. I think I really fucked up on skipping this one. No tear. Anger.

Cowgirl Creamery. I actually made it to the Ferry Building location but I didn't see a breakfast sandwich on the menu. I asked the lady but she said they had other sandwiches that day. There was confusion. I ended up with a Mt. Tam and Ham sandwich which was delicious but not a breakfast sandwich even though I ate it for breakfast. Then I ate oysters and a bloody mary to try to forget about the confusion. Then I ate Deem Sum which is not even close to being a breakfast sandwich but is super tasty. I give it all a 4.87 miscellaneous food items out of 5 miscellaneous food items. That Mt. Tam cheese is really something special.

That leaves me with Ted's Delicatessen. I actually went to Ted's and ordered a breakfast sandwich. It was just just down the block, probably 350 feet away. Ted's doesn't really look like what you picture when you think "deli", it's kind of a cross between a deli and a convenience store. Ted makes his own version of the McMuffin and there is a lot to like about that. I reviewed the original McMuffin over a year ago but was intrigued to see how Ted's compared.

Check out that little egg drawing that looks like a flying saucer. You can see they have a couple of options for breakfast sandwiches.

Ted's McMuffin. Ted doesn't skimp on the cheese.

Gooey. The English muffin top got a little messed up when I cut the sandwich.

The Sandwich - Ted's McMuffin. I'd like to know what inspired Ted to offer his own version of the McMuffin and if the McDonald's Legal Department has ever sent him a cease & desist letter. I guess not, or he probably would have changed the name of the sandwich. The only choice on the sandwich is what type of cheese - cheddar, swiss, pepper jack. I went with cheddar. The cheese was melty and plentiful, there was a layer on the top and bottom, and in the photos you can see how the egg was folded around the sausage. I appreciate that level of attention to detail. The English muffin was toasted and kept everything together and the sausage was salty and exactly what I had hoped for.

The Result - 4.35 Tedheads out of 5 Tedheads. I'm on board with Ted's McMuffin and Ted in general. I like Ted's style - ripping off McDonald's. This was a really great but simple breakfast sandwich. The price is right at $5, especially by San Francisco standards and it's far tastier than a regular McMuffin and worth the extra $1.71. It's ample enough to power you through the morning, in this case it got me through the San Francisco Museum of Modern Art.

I think this has something to do with sandwiches.

Follow on Twitter @BunBreakfast

Facebook page