Sunday, September 24, 2017

Breakfast Sandwich #100 - Players Sports Bar aka Divine Non-Intervention

Sandwich: Buzzy with Bacon
Location: Players Sports Bar & Grill
Date: September 16, 2017
Cost: $7.50, with cheesy hash browns

Whoa. 100 sandwiches is a lot of sandwiches to review so excuse me while I pat myself on the back and dab my eyes with a slightly greasy napkin. Just give me a minute to pull myself together. I couldn't have done it without all of you and those amazing people who get up early on Saturday and Sunday mornings to make sandwiches for all of us. With apologies to Kevin Durant, they are the real MVP. Actually, I could have done it without you, but I appreciate you reading these things anyway. I'm not sure they serve a purpose or fulfill a greater good but here we are. We have sifted and winnowed and fought and cried and I think we are better people for it. Truly.

I thought my 100th review should be special. I wasn't sure what that would be, but I started thinking about it sometime around sandwich #95. I ruled out going to McDonald's for the 6th time.

And then an opportunity presented itself. Through casual conversation I learned that The Buzzy Sandwich at Players is named after a person named Buzzy. The person that told me this also knows Mr. Buzzy and the Buzzy family. You might recall that this endeavor began with a Buzzy Sandwich back on New Years Day, 2015 and I reviewed The Buzzy again 20 months later just to see how things were holding up. A discussion was started about how I might have a Buzzy with Mr. Buzzy. I'm not one to believe in invisible forces that somehow interject themselves into our daily lives but this was a pretty strong signal from the Sandwich Gods, or whoever. This would be how sandwich #100 goes down. Unless it isn't.

I may not believe in divine intervention but I firmly believe that timing plays a crucial role in our lives. Everything is about timing. Meeting the right person at the right time in your life can lead to blissful love, a new career or playing harmonica with Yo-Yo Ma. Whatever. But the timing has to be right. If the timing is off, you got nothing. So, while I say I don't believe in divine intervention I do believe in divine non-intervention, or something like that. 

All of this is leading up to me saying that I did not have a Buzzy with Mr. Buzzy. So it goes. I did, however, have a Buzzy sandwich.

Jaunty triangles
Tantalizing purity
The Buzzy sandwich

"You sure do look purdy".
The Sandwich - The Buzzy with bacon. Important note!! I did not take a photo of the menu but The Buzzy is no longer offered with sausage but it is now available with a hamburger patty. That sounds pretty damn tasty but it did get me to thinking about how it would all hold together. The Texas toast is substantial and would probably be up to the task but there is no substitute for testing your theories in the field. Your other option is ham. As with my previous Buzzy sandwiches, I selected bacon. For my 100th sandwich (pause for applause) I thought I should pay tribute to my original sandwich and get back to my roots. Sometimes when you're on a long journey it's good to pause and reflect on where you started. Hence, the bacon. No regrets. There isn't much to say about this sandwich that I haven't already said. The chicken eggs were cooked a little more than I prefer but there was plenty of cheese to offset that (note the photo - there is a cheese slice top AND bottom. That is advanced level sandwiching.) The bacon, egg and cheese ratios blend perfectly and the Texas toast is the proper vehicle to get this crammed into your maw. If I have any complaint is that it's a touch too salty. I think maybe it's the toast that pushes the sodium level in to the red line.

The Result - 4.5 Divine Non-Interventions out of 5 Divine Non-Interventions. This was an excellent sandwich. They are very consistent with The Buzzy and that is important. It was only the saltiness that kept this rating at 4.5 which is still an amazing ranking. There may or may not have been a single salty tear that ran down down my cheek and onto my sandwich, the result of not meeting Mr. Buzzy. You can't argue with timing though, and when the time is right, I believe I will meet Mr. Buzzy.

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Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Breakfast Sandwich #99 - Starbucks aka Maybe You've Heard Of It

Sandwich: Sausage, Egg and Cheddar
Location: Starbucks (East Washington Ave.)
Date: September 12, 2017
Cost: $3.45

I think Starbucks is the last national chain for me to visit in the Madison area. I hope so, at least. I need to be free of these chains. There are a few local places I've been meaning to get to but time has not allowed and Starbucks was an easy stop before work. I needed to put this notch in my sandwich belt so I could move on to actual cafes and restaurants. Please God - do not allow Arby's to start selling breakfast sandwiches in the Madison area.

So, there I was at Starbucks. The line for the drive thru was predictably long at 8:15 am but I was planning on going inside anyway. I didn't want to lose whatever freshness the sandwich might have had by waiting until I got to work to eat it.

They have several choices of breakfast sandwich. I had no idea. I guess I don't go to Starbucks very often. I was in the mood for sausage so I didn't think about it too much. (Also, I've been making bacon-based sandwiches at home lately but not writing about them as they aren't really lab experiments. I haven't been pushing the sandwich envelope, just making simple, tasty sandwiches. Pro tip - if you're going to cook your chicken egg inside a Mason jar lid to get that "perfect puck" egg, use plenty of non-stick spray or your egg will stick to the lid and it tears the edges apart and it looks like it's been nibbled by vermin.)

Kinda sad looking.

I didn't have a knife so this was cut with my incisors. It was not nibbled by vermin. 
The Sandwich - Sausage, Egg and Cheddar. These sandwiches come out of sealed plastic bag so while you have several choices you don't have any options once you have made your selection. Starbucks isn't really a food place - everything comes out of bag from a kitchen factory somewhere. For all I know this sandwich was assembled by robots. The chicken egg was exactly what you expect for a pre-packaged sandwich (if you're new to this blog that isn't a good thing.) The microwave setting melted the cheese perfectly - kudos to the Starbucks lab technicians who tested that down to the microsecond. The sandwich was nice and hot. The sausage was actually pretty good. It hit the spot I was hoping it would. Despite being microwaved the English Muffin held up fairly well and wasn't soggy. This is by no means a messy sandwich so it really didn't have it's mettle tested, but it worked.

The Result - 2.75 Breaking The Chains out of 5 Breaking The Chains. This sandwich was fine. It was OK. It was actually tasty in some ways. I can see how it would tide you over until lunch if you're on your way to work. But, it's a $2.75 sandwich masquerading as a $3.45 sandwich. That's not cutting it for this reporter. I swipe left. (I'm going to assume there is a sandwich blog out there where the reviewer either "swipes left" or "swipes right" on a sandwich and that is the review. I'm not going to Google it. You go ahead though. If that doesn't exist it seems like a perfectly good idea for some snarky millennial to pursue.)

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