Breakfast Sandwich #72 - A Homemade Jobber aka I Plead The Fifth

Sandwich: Bacon, Kale, Egg & Swiss
Location: Top Secret Laboratory
Date: November 20, 2016
Cost: It would be rude to ask

I haven't reviewed a homemade sandwich since February 2015 and that was one of only a handful of homemade reviews, all of which took place in January and February of that year.

Sandwiches #2, #3, #4 and #10 were all the result of work in the lab.

It's already been determined that nobody gives a rat's ass about my homemade sandwiches but I do count them towards the overall tally (which was 52 but is now 100, for some reason) so they need to be recorded. The folks in the Consumables Division at the Smithsonian were very clear about this.

Lack of public interest aside, these homemade sandwich reviews are valuable for two reasons. #A, you can see the framework with which I judge other sandwiches. #B, you can mock my culinary skills, which if inspected closely might lead you to believe that I was taught to cook by a chef with two left hands.

The reason that this sandwich came to be was because I went shopping for Thanksgiving and while putting the chicken eggs away I realized I had everything needed for an experiment. Serendipitous! It occurred to me that I hadn't been in the lab for some time and so I set to work on my fifth sandwich.

You have to admit that this looks pretty good.

We have a little yolk action here.

The Sandwich - Brownberry 12 Grain Bread, StoneRidge Pit Smoked Bacon, Deppeler's Aged Whole Milk Swiss (the link shows a partially skimmed milk version), Kale, Egg. I baked the bacon in the oven and used some of the grease to cook the kale. I think I used too much, the kale was a little greasy. The egg was just a tiny bit overcooked but had some runny yolk. The cheese wasn't as melty as I would have liked it but this Swiss is so tasty it almost didn't matter. It was slightly gooey so not a complete failure. The bread was toasted perfectly (with lots of butter) and the bacon was crisp. The StoneRidge bacon was good for this sandwich, slightly smokey, not too slaty, and thick cut so it brings some heft. This was a mostly impressive sandwich and made me wonder why I've only made 5 sandwiches over the course of 72.

The Result - 4.3 Homemade Sandwiches out of 5 Homemade Sandwiches. The devil is in the details. The flavor was there on this one but I was just a little off on the cheese, egg and kale. It was still a fantastic sandwich and I might have rated it higher if it had been served to me in a local establishment. That's assuming it didn't come with a $14 price tag and a side of foraged quinoa with fluffed artichoke foam and seaweed vapor. As it was it came with a side of messy kitchen and a touch of pride.

WARNING - If I can get my hands on a turkey egg there may be some work done in the lab that involves Thanksgiving leftovers made into a post-Thanks breakfast sandwich. I'm not sure I'll be able to find one, and I don't intend to work very hard at it, but it strikes me as a lab worthy endeavor. I could use chicken egg but it wouldn't be as much fun. 

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